Something happened over the weekend that made me really think. A very good friend of mine was arrested for a DUI. Without going into the gory details, I have to say that hearing the news shook me to my core. It shook me because I didn’t know what to think.
First, of course, I worried that she was okay. When I first heard she had just been arrested and was on her way to booking I could only imagine. The only time I ever rode in the back of a cop car was for, ironically, a journalism field trip we took to the San Jose Police Station for the
Sober Graduation articles we were writing. I imagined the mug shot and the “drunk tank.” All horrifically playing out in my mind.
Second, I got mad. But this emotion didn’t last very long. I definitely didn’t think “how could she do this?” I didn’t think it because that would have been a pot and kettle hypocrisy. I’ve been there. Before I got pregnant I quit drinking for a year because I was imbibing a little too much. Now, it was mostly at home or at a friend’s house and my husband was my DD, but I KNOW there were times when I drove and I shouldn’t have.
Third, I got empathetic. Does she need someone to talk to about making the decision to quit drinking? Does she need someone to tell her that she’s not a bad Mom? Does she need someone to tell her that she made a horrible mistake and that I’m here to help her get through it? This is the route I’m looking to take right now. I haven’t talked to her over the phone. I know a couple of other friends have. We’ve exchanged text messages but I haven’t heard her story. I don’t know that it matters. All I, as her friend, want to do from this point is help her to get through this. She needs friends and I am ready and willing to be there.
So…hug your hunny and your kiddos tonight. Think hard about having that drink and putting the keys in the ignition. I know that this has (for lack of a better term) sobered me and I’ll make better decisions knowing it could happen to anyone.
~Becky
