31 Things: Days 12 and 13

After a brief absence that included a dance recital, wine tasting in Amador, a couple of parties here at the house and a trip to Reno (hopefully some posts to come with those events), I am back in the land of the blog. Up today are stories number 12 and 13. Watch for placing all the blame on my parents in number 13 and now that I think back on number 12 – I could probably edit it a bit more. The TV watching (aside from kid shows) is at about zero. Maybe I’ll just leave it as is because I do wish I had some extra time to zone out in front of the TV, but lately, if I have some spare minutes, my face is buried in my book and not in front of the Samsung.

Story 12: Watch

TV watching, like many other things, most specifically private time in the restroom and long, luxurious baths, went out the window once I had children. Well, not since I had children, but since I had a child that is old enough to look at the TV and say, “Mom! What is that blood?”

I love dead shows. I used to, and up until recently, watch every iteration of CSI, Law and Order, NCIS, Bones, etc. (notice the pattern?) About a year ago Allyson started paying attention to what Steve and I had on TV. That relegated TV watching to times when she had gone to bed or was napping. As time went on, and the DVR got more and more full, I realized that I just didn’t have the time I used to to sit and watch all that TV. Now it’s more Disney, Food Network and the quick ½ hour shows that we can watch with the kiddos awake. It’s probably for the best, less time in front of the TV means more time up and about. More time seeing what the kiddos are getting into and just “being” with them. It means more time for books at night and better, restful mornings.

I have found that I don’t miss it much. Sitting in front of a computer all day makes me not want to sit in front of any glowing thing at night. I love to read and listen to music and I feel that it’s important for both my children to see me doing that. Andrew LOVES a good song, and now that Ally is back into dance class, she’s pirouetting all over the place. She sings loudly to songs (and not just the kid ones) that she knows - this makes my eyes well up for some reason. All of these things would be lacking in our lives if we plopped down in front of the TV every free opportunity.

Even with all that, we probably watch too much. I am completely guilty of turning on a Disney show to get this or that accomplished around the house. I admitted in a previous post that I love me some Jeopardy. I am encouraged to see, however, that most of the time my kids don’t make it through one show. Halfway in, they’re bouncing around and moving on to the next great event or disaster in the making. 

So, I watch. I watch a little TV every now and then. I let my kids snuggle up with me and watch TV. More importantly, I watch myself to make sure we don’t end up completely dependent upon the TV. I watch to make sure that we’re getting outside and soaking up that wonderful California sunshine. I watch to make sure that we’re balancing the reading and singing and dancing with the TV time. But most importantly, I watch my little family grow up around me and make sure that I am “there” and not zoned out in front of some mind numbing program. These are the memory making days and I’d much rather those be out in our backyard than in front of the latest episode of Sponge Bob. 

Story 13: Chores

I never had to do chores growing up. My Mom cleaned my room, did my laundry, picked up the house. She did everything. When she went back to work when I was in elementary school I remember having house cleaners but she was still the one that did everything around the house to keep it tidy. That being said, my room was always a disaster. So when the house cleaners would come, they’d make my bed and then pick all my crap up off the floor and place it on the bed to “clean” the rest of the room. Ridiculous, right?

So, Mom. I’m sorry for that. Thank goodness we had a two-story house and you could hide the disaster that was my room from any company we might have had. You should have kicked me in the ass and made me clean it up. And now you are getting your revenge.

Today. I am faced with a house that I am in charge of keeping neat and tidy. And I hate house work. And Steve, although he’s kind of a neat freak and is very particular about many things, is not a house cleaner either. He grew up in a house with a Mom that did not work most of the time her boys were in school, so she did everything for him. No housework for Mr. Carroll either. Then, Steve moved from his Mom’s house to his wife’s house. We got to a point in our lives, early on in our marriage, where we fought about house work. What? Fights about this? No way Jose. We had to find another way.

I know that many would think that we took the easy way out and that we may just be, bottom line, lazy but we did what we had to do. We hired a house cleaner. She visits us every two weeks and does all the deep cleaning. You know what? Steve and I stopped fighting about the housework. We still have dishes and laundry and picking up to do on a daily basis, but cleaning toilets, mopping floors and dusting blinds is all taken care of. Sure – we have to pay for it. But we both work 40 hour a week jobs and decided that is was worth the cash to be able to come home and play with the kids in the backyard and take trips to Grandma’s house on the weekends rather than worry about when the baseboards were last scrubbed.

I still fight my inner slob to make sure that the kitchen counters are uncluttered and the dishwasher is running. I fight against my disdain for laundry and all that makes it my own personal torture. But I know that I need to be thankful to able to afford to have someone come in and help us out.

My struggle now is helping Allyson to know what chores look like. She’s going to grow up as I did, and have someone do much of the hard stuff for her. But unlike my Mom did for me (sorry Mom – you are wonderful at so many things, but making your kids do chores you were not-so-good at), she needs to learn to do some of this. She’s four years old, so I wonder what she can tackle at this age. We already battle about leaving her shoes all over the floor (I’m a culprit too) and putting things away when she’s done with them (again – guilty.) So I have to try harder. I have to try harder to set a good example for her. To hold her to responsibilities that are hers to keep. And to make sure that she knows that even though we may have some help, it is our responsibility to keep our things nice and have a home that we’re proud to invite people over to. Easier said than done.   

~Becky

31 Things: Days 10 & 11

So I’ve decided. Rather than wait until I have the perfect picture to go with these posts I’m going to take a photo from stuff that I already have and insert that instead. This last page sat open on my desk for a whole week because I didn’t know what picture to put in it. Forget that. I’m going with “life as we know it.” The pics from here on out might come from the good camera, might come from Instagram or even just a quick and blurry snapshot off the old iPhone. Telling the story is more important. 

Story 10: Evening

Our evenings have made a big turnaround. Since I made the switch in my hours I am actually enjoying our evenings quite a bit more. They’re less rushed and less hectic. I can actually enjoy the time with my family and not feel like I wasted an entire day at the office to come home and hurry my kids through dinner, bath and story time.

With my new job, I’m typically home around 5pm. I’ll admit that the only negative thing about the daycare for our kids is how far away it is. When we lived in our old house, her house was perfect! Now that we’ve moved out to Lincoln, driving all the way to Citrus Heights from Rocklin is essentially going the opposite direction, turning around and coming back to where I started. If I leave the office at four, I’m not home until 5 with them. Rough – but my kids are taken care of like family and that’s hard to put a convenience factor on.

When we get home at five I immediately go into dish duty. I like to have all the dishes done before I start making dinner. It may seem like cleaning up a mess before you make a mess makes no sense, but I like to cook in a reasonably clean kitchen and this method works for me. It also helps that the time right after we get home is a good time for the kids. They’re usually fresh off a snack from school or daycare and are happy to run around the backyard or play with their toys while I hang out in the kitchen cleaning up and starting dinner.

On some weeks I am incredibly organized and know what is in the fridge to make for dinner. Or even better – if I have something that has been cooking in the CrockPot all day. Lately, I have not been so good and dinner consists of whatever concoction I can pull out of the fridge.      We, at the very least, steer clear of the fast food jungle. We may not be eating the best of entrees but it is very rarely out of a drive-thru.

Steve will usually get home somewhere in the middle of the dishes and making dinner process. He’ll head to the bedroom to unwind and change his clothes – and usually has one or both kiddos in tow.

We try to sit down as a family and eat dinner. On nights that Steve doesn’t have softball or Ally soccer, we sit down and eat as a family. The TV is usually on but it could be cartoons, one of the family friendly sitcoms that Steve and try to keep up with or a game show. If at all possible, when 6:30 rolls around, we’ve got Jeopardy on.

*Side story – When Allyson came home from school with an “All About My Mom” paper, on it was a question about what shows her Mom likes to watch. She said “Jeopardy!” I’ll admit I was proud. That girl can sing the theme song with the best of them. I tooted my own horn and patted myself on the back because this Momma doesn’t watch anything Kardashian or Real Housewives. I’ll gladly share Jeopardy (or even Wheel of Fortune with my kids) because it’s just what my parents did.*

After dinner, I try (try, try, try) to get the dishes done. Invariably, the hand washing gets leftover (see above) but the dishwasher is usually running by 7. Then it’s relax time. I’ll park it on the couch and snuggle one or both of the kids. I try to refrain (okay – honestly it doesn’t even cross my mind) from doing laundry on a weeknight. Bath is usually around 7:45 then its jammies and bed for the munchkins. I like to get Andrew in bed before 8:30 and then Ally sometime before 9.  Sometimes it works, sometimes I just need some extra cuddles and Ally is pleading (and making her case) for dessert.

After the kids go to bed, Steve’s usually in the chair watching a show. I typically head to the bedroom to get my own jammies on and maybe read a little before lights out. 5:45 alarm for me means I need to get to bed before 10. This girl needs her 8 hours (ya right) of beauty sleep!

Story 11: Nourish

I don’t know that I think about food all that often. I don’t dream about food or wish for food. If I want it, I’ll make it (or buy it.) I do, however, like to cook. I get great pleasure out of following a recipe or perusing through my food magazines. I find myself clipping recipes out of them, or printing them off from a website. Sometimes I find the time to put the ingredients together and make something, but other times the clipped recipe goes up in the cabinet and gets lost. When I think about the word nourish, here’s what comes to mind.

1. I’d like to get more organized about our food. There have been a few weeks where I shopped for and planned every dinner for a week. I wrote out a list and posted it on the fridge saying “in here we have stuff for this, this and that.” It totally worked. Why have I not done more of this?
2.  My husband is an incredibly picky eater. He doesn’t eat any fruit or vegetables. This makes cooking hard at times. I know that I could cook a veggie or fruit filled dinner, but then he’d end up eating a sandwich. Doesn’t make me feel so great. He’s good about it. He doesn’t expect me to cater to him at all, I just feel that as his wife and as the chief meal preparer I need to make sure he’s getting something good too. I’m pretty sure I would only want to change this one thing about him. I’ll take everything else just as he is (I love that man!) I just wish that he’d be more flexible with his food choices.
3.  (This is more 2.5.) I hope my kids don’t turn out like their Dad in the pickiness factor. I try very hard to introduce them to lots of different food. I feel like I’ve done a pretty good job and the kids like lots of different things. I just worry that one day Allyson or Andrew will say “why isn’t Daddy eating this?” “If Daddy doesn’t have to eat this, then I won’t either.” I’ve warned Steve about this day and have told him that it is an issue that he will have to deal with. He doesn’t want them to turn out like him either. Hmm…that will be an interesting time in the Carroll house.
4. I would like to pack more lunches for myself. Every night Steve or I (or as a team) pack lunches for the kiddos. They get a sandwich – usually – but also fruit, yogurt and a couple snacks. Why aren’t we packing our own lunches? Yes – I know I don’t want a sandwich every day, but we consistently have leftovers in the fridge. They should go in my own lunch bag just like they do for the kids. I will get better about this. Next month. This month, the focus is on exercise (but more on that another time.)
5. My favorite food is probably Japanese. I love me some teppan-yaki. It could be that I find it difficult to duplicate at home and therefore it’s a treat when I do get it. I love the Benihana style dinners. Shrimp, steak, fried rice, zucchini and onions – all seared to perfection on a super hot grill. Yum-mo!

That’s five food related things about me. Throw in a nice crisp chardonnay and a gorgeous early summer evening. You’ll find us outside, cooking on the grill and throwing the ball for the dogs. Nourished perfection. Bon appétit!

~Becky

31 Things: Days 8 & 9

Today’s stories are quick glimpse into some history. The first is about my cars. As I write this, however, I neglected to mention any fender benders or anything of that nature. Hmm…maybe that will have to be a part 2.

The second story is about purchases. Big ones and little ones and the ones that you have to scrimp and save for. Here we go…

Story 8: Transportation

My first car was a 1989 Jeep Wrangler. I loved that Jeep and it started my continued desire to own something from the Jeep family of vehicles. I got the Jeep when I turned 16 when my Dad got a newer one. It was a manual 4x4, without air conditioning, but neither was really needed in San Jose where I grew up. It was bright red with a giant sun painted on the hood and the sides, called the Islander edition. It was a soft top with plastic windows that zipped up and down and didn't have any locks on the doors. Awesome.

I only really got to drive that car for a year and a half. I didn't turn 16 until May of my junior year in high school (I skipped a grade and therefore was always the youngest one in the class). I drove that Jeep all summer · love! The top down, the tunes on and my girlfriends and I just explored all over the South Bay.

When it was time to go away to school in Arizona, my parents decide that an unlocking Jeep without A/C was not the best vehicle for Arizona State. While I didn't love the Saturn that they bought me, I knew they were right. That little Saturn was loaded and was an awesome crushing vehicle for the long drives between Arizona and San Jose.

Shortly before I moved home to Auburn, I bought my very first car - of course it was a Jeep Wrangler. Maroon with a tan top, I loved that one too. It was in that Jeep that I met Steve and my strange new relationship with cars would begin. I now pay attention to things I never ever would have. I drove a Mustang GT for awhile (and ended up plowing it into a fence.) We owned a Scion xB (yup the little toaster cars) and a Chevy HHR. All had specific purposes, but none were "mine." Steve, as you can tell, doesn't hang on to cars very long.

Right now I'm driving a 2004 Chevy Tahoe. I do love this Tahoe. It's the perfect size for our little family of four + two dogs. Sure, I'd like something shinier and newer, but this baby is paid off and I have plans on driving it until the wheels falloff it.

While I'd love to go back to a little Jeep Wrangler (even the four door version) I know that with the kids, transporting strollers, high chairs, two dogs and the occasional extra passenger, a big, huge, SUV makes the most sense for us at this time in our lives.

Story 9: Purchase

As I pulled the car into the garage the other day I stopped and thought for a moment how much stuff we have. I’m not just talking about the daily clutter and the “stuff” that you need to get rid of. We have lots of that stuff. The stuff that I was thinking about was everything we have purchased to make a life for ourselves. We still have quite a few hand-me-downs, but we’re slowly building our lives as a family and with that building comes a lot of purchases,

At this time in our lives, I would say that we’re the most proud of our house. After spending some time in a teeny tiny little starter home, Steve and I worked hard to be able to purchase the home we currently live in. When we found out we were pregnant with Andrew we knew that the two bedroom home we brought Allyson home to and bought right before we were married was not going to work for our growing family. It was a stressful time because I was pregnant. We rented out the little house and moved in with my parents and then started searching for a new place. When we moved out we weren’t even sure we could afford another house, but we knew that whether we bought or rented something else, we needed something bigger.

After five months with my parents, and me freaking out that were going to bring our new baby home to my parent’s house, the house deal closed and we moved in one month before Andrew was born. It was a crazy time, but one I’m so very proud of. It was a big (huge) purchase, but one that was the step in the right direction. It’s not our forever home, I mean, come on, we had to qualify for it with both mortgages and no rental income, but it’s ours and we love it and it suits us perfectly.  

As I was sitting there, I also started to think about all the stuff we have bought for this gorgeous new home (and also all the stuff we brought with us.) We’re so thankful to have good jobs that help support this lifestyle to which we have become accustomed. We make it work. We’re not in crazy amounts of debt and intend not to head down that direction (sure we could purchase a little less and save a little more) but we’re building a future and sometimes that takes money.

So for now, the only big purchases on our horizon are an October trip to Disneyland, a patio cover for the back yard and a new home computer. None are life necessities and are more wants than needs, but we’ll make them happen in the not too distant future. And after writing this, I’m going to go make a few extra payments to the savings account and credit card bill. Nothing like a little self-reflection to put your priorities in order.  

~Becky

31 Things: Days 6 & 7

I really enjoyed these next two stories. Writing about myself can be difficult at times, but the prompts that Ali provided made it much easier.

The second story, the one about work, was fun too but it could be that I’m just still so new in my job that it’s enjoyable and exciting for me right now. You should really like what you do, right? Why else would I get up and leave my family every morning.

Story 6: You

1. Age: 31
2. Favorite part of my day: Right now it’s the first hour after I get to work. After I get over the hate of waking up early and getting into the office by 7, I truly enjoy sitting at my desk, organizing my day and sipping my coffee. I listen to Rob, Arnie and Dawn on my iPhone and drink whatever decaf Keurig brew I threw in the maker this morning. Right now I’m enjoying one Equal and a little ½ and ½ in my coffee – I know I should drink it black but it feels like a reward for getting up so early.
3. Loving: Feeling less stressed lately. Sure, there will always be demands upon my time and things “I really need to get to” but I really feel that I’m in a good place right now. I like my job – still learning. We signed papers yesterday to sell our first house and close that door. Steve and I are doing well, making a team effort to tackle this crazy life of ours. It’s a good place. I hope I can find remember this feeling when things get crazy again (and I know they will.)
4. Longing for: A trip to Disneyland with the kids. Need to plan it, just need to find the right time. I think we’re going to go in October for a wedding – right after Andrew turns two, but I haven’t done one thing to get us there. I also long for some extra time to get all the “papers” organized.  Between bills I need to file, Ally’s schoolwork to go through and old magazines, we are inundated by paper. I long for some uninterrupted time to purge!
5. Inspired by: My friends. Whether it be the ones that run, the ones that make it to every practice and every game, the ones that photograph and document, the ones that make moves that are scary but good for their families or the ones that make a job a career. They all inspire me. 
6. Dreaming of: Some extra sleep and snuggle time with my husband and kiddos.
7. Needing: To stick with my 5K plan and try to eat a little better. I’m off to a good start, just need to keep up the momentum. I don’t want to read this a year from now and think – “well, you made it a week and a half.” I will do this!
8. Navigating: Motherhood and career. How to be all things to all people, not perfectly, but acceptably. Excel at the things I’m good at and let go the things that I struggle with. Leave work at the office and focus on family. Keep our lives trucking forward but make time for the fun.
9. Struggling with: Keeping up the housework. It seems never to end. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll be able to get my work at home Fridays back and can alleviate some of that stress. Being gone all day at work and then coming home to dinner and dishes is all I can seem to handle well. Laundry, organization and picking up always get thrown by the wayside.
10. Knowing: That I have a truly wonderful family. I have amazing kiddos, a handsome husband, a loving Mom that keeps me on track and a group of friends I wouldn’t trade for anything. I am genuinely fortunate.

Story 7: Work

Work.

I’ve written about this topic a number of times. It’s an important one for me because doing the work that I enjoy forces a balancing act between what I need to do, what I should be doing and what I want to do.

I work. I work 40 hours a week. Monday through Friday. And the majority of the time, at least most of the time over the last six years give or take a few blips, I really love my work.

Today I work at a credit union as a business analyst. I’m responsible for making sure that projects the credit union puts forth are completed accurately, timely and cleanly. I like this job (I’ve only been doing it for a little over a month now) because I get to use the closet geek in me. I get to talk IT stuff with the IT guys, but I also get to talk member-centric (that’s credit union for customer-centric) with the businesses. I love it.

Could I work less hours and be at home more with my kiddos? Sure. Do I like making good money, getting an outlet for adult conversation and building a career? Yup – you betcha!  (Here’s where the balancing act comes into play.)

With this new job, I feel quite a bit less stress than I have in the past. I’m not exactly sure why, because I’m still learning and doing things I haven’t done in the past. But maybe it’s that excitement that is alleviating the stressful nature of the job. I enjoy coming in, doing new things and then leaving those things in the office when I go home to my family. I’m sure this job will pick up and there will be days that I want to run away. But for now, it’s new and exciting. It’s entertaining and it makes me think. Just what I needed in my life.

Being less stressed means a better Becky for my family. It means that I enjoy the time we have together in the evenings and on the weekends because my mind isn’t constantly swirling with what’s going on in the office. I’m hoping (hoping hoping) that I’ll be able to get some of my work from home privileges back. I’m fairly confident I will, I just want to prove myself a bit more before I broach the topic with my new boss. If I can work that back in, then – woohoo – I am one happy camper.

So, work for me means sitting in front of a computer, answering emails and mind-numbing spreadsheets. It means managing projects and bridging the gap between what the frontline wants and what IT says they can actually have. But it’s work that I like. Sure, there’s work at home too. Laundry, dishes, cleaning, yucko. I can’t think of that like work though. That’s just what you’ve got to do to make the family run.

Now…I have to get back to work.  

~Becky

31 Things: Days 4 & 5

Here are two stories that really made me think. Neither was all that easy for me to write about, but once I finished I really felt good about them.

Story 5: Conversation, was written and then re-written and then written again. I struggled at first to find the right type of conversation to write about and then settled on the conversation that really defines me. 

Story 4: Spirit

This prompt was a bit more difficult for me to tackle. While I know that I’m not a religious person, I’ve always thought that being spiritual didn’t have to necessarily go hand in hand with that.

I wasn’t raised in a church setting. My parents told my brother and me, “you’ll just decide when you get older.” I know that my Dad was born Catholic, went through communion and at his core believes deeply in that faith. But I never once saw him go to church. My Mom told me she was baptized a Lutheran, but again, no church on Sunday for this family. I’m thankful that my parents left this decision up to us. I’m glad that they didn’t force us into anything they didn’t wholeheartedly believe themselves. If they weren’t sure, I’m glad they didn’t fake it for our benefit.

As many of my friends embark, or continue, down this path of faith, I look upon them and smile. I am glad that they have found this calling. I’m glad that they find comfort in the words of the Bible or enjoyment in their time spent participating in church activities. I just know that it’s not for me.

Although many would say that I’m a bit outgoing, I like to laugh loud and often, I also feel like I’m a fairly private person. I like to think that I listen or give advice, sometimes probably unwarranted, but I don’t know that I put myself out there to receive it. That being said, I do an awful lot of self-reflection. Steve calls me a pessimist, but I know that deep down inside, I am really a realist. I see life for what it is and what becomes of my actions. My spirit is in constant battle with my brain thinking, “could I have said that differently? Should I have done more for that friend in need? Is there any other way I can help?”

I know that while I raise my children without the church or any specific faith, I am giving them what they need to be good people. Giving of yourself to others transcends any religion or doctrine. So does being kind and thankful, honest and philanthropic. I try very hard to be those things and I am raising my children to be so as well.

What I do know, is that I try very, very hard, everyday, to be a good, genuine person. When I’m gone from this earth, I want people to think “Becky was a genuinely good person. She cared about others. She raised her children with good, healthy morals. She raised kind and thankful children. She was a good wife and a wonderful friend.” That’s not too hard, right? 

Story 5: Conversation

I love having conversations with my parents. Aside from my husband and my children, I probably talk to my Mom the most and my Dad a close second.

I love these conversations with them. And as I get older and watch friends go through situations where they lose contact with their parents, lose them to death or just fall out of touch, I am continually thankful that I have the both of them to chat it up with. I cherish the relationship I have with them and know that I won’t have it forever (hopefully for decades and decades) but I know that life doesn’t always work out the way you plan. I need to take advantage while I can.

Sometimes the conversations are tough. We’ve been through a lot, parent and child tough stuff. They talk sometimes about the “other Becky.” The one that went off to college, fell off the face of the earth and became the person they didn’t raise. The one that flunked out of college and had to come crawling back home to put herself back together and learn how to be a responsible adult. No I didn’t do anything illegal. I was just a lost girl that needed her Mom and Dad to help set her back on the right path. That conversation, the come home or we’re cutting you off conversation, was probably the toughest one I’ve ever had. As a parent, I know how hard it must have been for them – much harder than it was for me – but I’m glad they did it because I know for a fact that I wouldn’t be living the life that I’m living today without it. Without that conversation I wouldn’t have moved home, met my husband, graduated college, bought a house, got married and then had two gorgeous children. For all that, I thank them.

But most of the time the conversations are just life’s speed bumps. I don’t know if it’s normal or appropriate, but I bounce pretty much everything off of one of my parents before I take any plunge and I’m fortunate that I get to do so. I’m not looking for their acceptance or agreement (maybe I am…yeah I probably am…or at least most of the time), but I know that I usually feel better after a conversation with one or both of them and have their knowledge and wisdom to consider. Sometimes I may disagree with their opinion, but more often than not, it just reinforces the fact that “I am my father’s/mother’s daughter.”

Back in high school and even before I really don’t know that I had the free flowing conversations that I have with them today. Sure, my parents were always “there” for me, but maybe it takes being an adult and having a family of my own to really understand and appreciate all they have to offer in the advice department.

From how to deal with unruly employees (thanks Dad) to how to raise an independent and outgoing daughter (Mom, we’re still working on this one), they are available and eager to talk. I know that no matter the time, the day, the subject, I can talk to either one of them and leave feeling better.

So, thanks Mom and Dad. Thanks for the talks. Thanks for the advice. Thanks for listening when it was appropriate and thanks for kicking me in the ass when I need it. Thanks for being awesome. I love you.

~Becky

31 Things: Days 2 & 3

Here are the next two stories from my 31 Things class. Neither too heart wrenching or detailed, but little slices of my life at the moment. 

Story 2: Morning

I’ve never been a morning person. Morning time is a wonderful thing. A wonderful thing for sleeping. I love my sleep so much and never function that well off of less than 8 hours of it. As I get older, and there feel like there are fewer and fewer hours in the day, that 8 hours per night has become a thing of the past. But when I do get in that full night’s sleep. Oh! I am one happy girl.

I’m sure I’ve always been this way – in fact I know I was because my Mom always tells me how much of a drag it was getting me up in the morning. I was the night owl and would stay up late with the adults, but then there were the mornings.  Well, mornings always came too quickly.

As recently as February 2012, I was the late bird at work. I would take my time sleeping in in the morning. Get up, get the kids ready, take them to daycare and then get into the office around 9. I did this for four years. But while the sleeping in was great, the getting home at 6 every night was not so good. I always had to rush to feed the kiddos, Steve and me. We ended up eating garbage because I didn’t have the time to make us a healthy meal. I spent little time with the kiddos before they needed to be off to bed. I didn’t really know it at the time, but it just wasn’t working for us.

In February I started a new job and at that time decided to make a life decision. I realized that in order for our family to function better, I needed to be home earlier. The only way that was going to happen, because, you know, I’m a working mom, was to head into the office earlier. Steve and I talked it over and decided that it would probably work. He takes the kiddos to daycare and I pick them up. I’m off to work while the munchkins are still sleeping and he can stay out and work a bit longer if he needs to. I can hit the grocery store on the way home with them if I need to. We can start dinner and then head to the park for a little while. I can enjoy my evenings with my children because we’re not rushed through dinner, bath and bed. And then…there’s even some time for Steve and I. That – we really needed. 

Now, mornings still suck. When my alarm goes off at 5:45 AM I want to throw it across the room. But over these last few months the getting up has been easier and easier. I’ve even found that I’m up earlier on the weekends. Glorious! I get the dishes done, drink a cup of coffee and read my book.  Sometimes all before the rest of the family gets up. I probably go to bed a little earlier at night. We’re definitely not watching as much TV because when it’s bed time for this girl it’s lights out. But there’s something to be said for that too. It’s all just good stuff.

Who knew that making this change would be so good for us? I’m just glad I did.    

Story 3: Read

What are you favorite past times? What do you like to do in your free time? Aren't those two of the most common questions asked? Either on job interviews or other nonsensical "tell me about yourself” questionnaires.

I always say "reading." It may sound boring but it's the honest truth.

I read. All the time. Any chance I get.

I don't read to be able to quote snooty passages from classics. I don't read to learn about myself or do something about myself (although I’ll admit that that happens sometimes.)  I read to get lost in another world. I read to take my mind off the stressors in my life. I read to put myself in a better place to be a better wife, a better mother, a better friend.

I also know that this is how I’ve always been, I have always been a reader. My Mom and Dad joke that I was reading War and Peace by age five (haven’t read that novel to this day – maybe I should crack it open). I know I read early in life. Go Dog Go was my favorite and is now one of go-to books to read to my kiddos. When other kids were playing video games or tearing up the neighborhood on their bicycles, my place would have always been wrapped up on the couch with a good book.

Today I worry that my children won’t love to read as much as I do. We have loads and loads of books in the house, picture books and chapter books, fiction and non-fiction, squeaky bath toy books and those meant to stay on dry land. Allyson loves her books, but she’s still at the age where she wants (needs) me to read to her. We’re working through identifying letters (she knows them all – upper and lower case), making word sounds and then sounding out words. But she loses interest in trying very quickly. And when it’s 9:30 pm and this Momma’s had a long day and has to get up early, I just snuggle up and read and decide to leave the lesson for another day. Thank goodness she has a magnificent preschool…and one whole year til kindergarten. This kiddo is going to be reading Day One.

Andrew – well. He likes to occasionally flip through books and then throw them. We have some time to work with Little Man on the love of the written word. He’s all boy, and I know that getting him interested in reading is a big deal. We read together often, he’s just usually off and running before I get through the third page. I won’t give up – I just understand that little boys are a bit different.

Back to my own reading. It could be anything, really. Lately I’ve been into historical fiction. Anything that takes me back to another time and place, throw in some battle scenes or “solve” an old mystery, and I’m hooked. I try, sometimes not very well, to add in some classics every now and then, but I do struggle through them. I force myself because I think it’s good for me to read some of these books, but when I have so little free time it’s often a battle lost over something more up my alley.

Now, I think I’ll go crack open another book.


~Becky

31 Things

In line with all this scrapbooking stuff I’ve been doing lately (I still find it hard to call it scrapbooking. It’s memory keeping – but I guess if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck…then…you know), I came across a class called 31 Things. It was created and is hosted by a woman named Ali Edwards who is kind of a big name in the scrapbooking world. Her blog is wonderful and the products she creates are fantastic, but she also hosts these scrap classes to share her ideas with the world.

31 Things is about telling stories. It’s about telling stories to share with your family and friends. I decided to join in because I am always looking for ways to get better at writing and I think it’s an awesome opportunity to take a snapshot of what life is like as a 31 year old married mother of two. Who knows? Maybe when Allyson is in her early thirties, she can take a look at this book and see that the stuff she’s feeling is normal and she can know (hopefully continue to know) how much I love her and our family.

So here’s my first day. I don’t know that I’ll actually get through posting them all to this blog. I’ve done pretty well at writing them all so far. It’s a little tough to keep up with a story every day, but I’m doing it. I really want to know how it turns out in the end.

Story 1: Jewelry

Even after 6 ½ years of marriage, I still get compliments on my wedding ring from complete strangers. I love this because I make a point to tell Steve when I next see him. It’s a funny thing, because I know he gets such a feeling of pride over this tiny little compliment. I love making my husband feel that way.

It’s also funny because I always get an “I told you so” from him. You see, when we were shopping for engagement rings I had this idea in my head of what I wanted. And what I learned from my very picky yet design-oriented husband was that what I wanted was the same thing that every other girl he knew had. He was dead set against this and no wife of his was going to have something you see everywhere.

Shopping for my wedding ring was one of the first times in my adult life that I let someone else take control of something that meant so much to me. I let Steve show me what it was like to step outside the box (for lack of a better cliché) for once and see what other possibilities there were. He’s just so good at seeing things in different ways. He thinks through all the angles and potentials before making a decision. Sure, sometimes I go out of my mind because we need to make a decision and he’s lagging, but in this instance, he was at the top of his game and knew what he was doing. That was one of the first of many life-changing moments with him, but more on those another time.

We shopped around, visited lots of different places. Being young, it’s not like we had unlimited funds, so designing something from scratch wasn’t really an option – even though I know that’s what he really would have liked to do. We finally decided on a few that we both liked and then I left the ultimate decision up to him. I mean, a girl has to be surprised, right?

 As you can see, “he did good.” And I love it. I take great pride in wearing it because I know that he’s happy with our choice. I wear that sucker every stinkin’ day without fail and I hope that strangers, when they compliment me, see on my face and in my eyes, how much I love that man and how proud I am to wear this token of his love and commitment for me every single day. 

Stay tuned...more to come. A little slice of my life.

~Becky

Project Life

I've been really getting into this world of digital scrapbooking lately. It's all, of course, thanks to my friend Lindsay and her influence (guidance/teaching/whatever.) I started out being pretty unsure of the process.  I felt a little silly about "scrapbooking." 

But then I really started to think about it. I started something called Project Life in the beginning of the year and am really (really) liking it.   

Project Life is all about capturing the everyday. It's about doing something with that giant box of pictures sitting in your hall closet. It's about unloading all the pictures from your camera's memory card and actually doing something with them. It's about taking the pictures that don't make "the wall", combining them with some journaling and some cute accents and making something your family can look at and remember. Project Life is designed to be done everyday - but there was no chance in hell I had time for that. But see, that's the other cool thing about it. You don't HAVE to do it everyday. You do it when the feeling strikes you. It's NO PRESSURE!


Scrapbooking, for me, is not about cute paper, silly stickers and your favorite acid-free glue.  Don't get me wrong, I totally see the lure in all that, it's just not for me. While you can do this traditionally - and by that I mean , paper, pens, stickers, etc - I chose to go another route and do it all digitally (but still have all the cute stuff, mind you). 

Here's what it means for me:

1. It is all digital (it really speaks to the geek in me). Here's where you can get all the digital Project Life kits.
2. It is calming and relaxing, it gives me an outlet for creativity.
3. I can sit at my computer, have a glass of wine, and just drag and drop.
4. I've always loved to write - and would love to get better at it. This gives me an outlet for writing. I can use Project Life to journal and tell the stories of our life.
5. Doing it digitally means I can print out copies for myself and both my children when the year is over. Do it once - print it as many times as I want. Sweet!
6. My husband thinks it's pretty cool. (Wha-wha?!?! Yup - he loves the idea and has been completely supportive.)

From time to time, I'll post some of my Project Life layouts here. I'm embarking on a project called 31 Things  that I'll share some of as well. 


My least fun tendencies continue - now into the world of digital scrapbooking. Eh. I'm okay with it. At least I'll have something to show for those tendencies. A beautiful book that tells our story. Something that can be looked at years (maybe even decades from now). That's just pretty cool.

~Becky

Until it happens to you...

When your job gets moved to another state it’s hard not to take it personally.  A morning show that I listen to locally talks continuously about the fact that if your job goes away or you get laid off that there was something you could have done differently to prevent it.  In this case, the whole organization is getting moved around. They’re not decreasing headcount, just moving bodies from one place to another.  And just to be clear, I’m not being laid off, I’m being re-assigned.

That doesn’t make this suck any less. I like my job, I’m good at it. I’ve spent a lot of time and energy learning and improving upon my skill set. I’m going to be sad to watch it go away. I think the worst part about all this is having gone through the pain of a large merger, completely re-assigning and re-training my staff in, for some of them, new roles, to watch it all go away less than six months later.

It’s hard not to take it personally and stay away from the “every man for himself” attitude. I have a staff of eleven I have to worry about. The majority of them are getting re-assigned as well, but they are for sure not all going to be pleased about the assignment. Coaching and guiding them through this is really going to be tough for me.  The potential for tears just gives me the heebie-jeebies because I’m just not all that great with emotion in a work setting.

And at the same time I have to come to terms with my new offer.  Do I accept on the grounds that it’s a job and a paycheck?  Do I accept and immediately start floating around the resume? Do I take this opportunity to spend some time at home with my kids (we all know that that craziness wouldn’t last long)?  Maybe go back to school or embark on a whole new profession? Lots of questions and not so many answers.

I’m thankful that my new boss is a person I have worked for, and enjoyed working for, in the past albeit in an entirely different role.  Knowing that I was grabbed by a former manager makes me feel as though I am valued in this organization and that they are interested in my future. Whether this is B.S. or not remains to be seen.

And then I think about those people within this company (or even those who have gone through this anywhere) that were not offered a "comparable" position and think that I need to quit my bitching. Perspective...

So tonight, like every other night, I go home, hug my kids and my husband.  I count my blessings that I have a nice job that allows me to support my family and our lifestyle and know that whatever decision I make will be the right one because I will have thought it through. No job is forever and I am in charge of my own destiny.  I just have to figure out what that destiny is.

~Becky

Am I Really 30? Day Five

My Favorite Quote

"Everything is funny, as long as it happens to somebody else."

Not the most PC or educated choice, but one that describes my love for the hilarious. With that being said, even the stuff that does happen to me I'll make a point to laugh at. It may be inappropriate at times, but I wholeheartedly think that if you can't laugh at the bad things that happen, then you can't get past them.

~Becky

Am I Really 30? Day Three

My Favorite TV Show

Ask anyone that knows me.  This one's pretty easy.  I'm a fan of the "dead shows."  I used to watch CSI: and L&O:SVU pretty religiously, but life gets in the way and Steve's not a huge fan.  Now that I think about it.  I haven't watched either of these in quite awhile.
 

 Steve and I have a few favorites that we watch together.  My brother turned us on to "Castle" this season and we really like it.  That's one that we'll jump ahead and watch before others.  It's my "dead show" matched with his comedy preferences.  It's a good one for us to snuggle up and watch together.

 

 We like Bones because of the chemistry between the main characters.  Also - "dead show" plus comedy...see a pattern?

Lastly is Fringe.  But as a person that doesn't really like to watch scary stuff, we never watch it before bed or I'll have nightmares.  

 Oh!  And I can't forget HIMYM (How I Met Your Mother.)  Gotta love Neil Patrick Harris - hilarious!

Wow.  All that makes it seem like we watch a heck of a lot of TV.  We really don't.  And I didn't even include the episodes of Yard Crashers Steve has been addicted to because we're doing our backyard.  Most of the time, we'll sneak one episode of something in before bed and after the kids go to sleep.  

What do you like to watch?
 
 ~Becky  

Am I Really 30? Day Two

My Favorite Movie

This one was actually pretty easy.  As my husband can attest, I really don't like to watch movies more than once.  Once I've seen it, I'm over it.  Been there, done that.  It could be because I have watched many a movie that you end with feeling "will I ever get those two hours of my life back?"  We've all been there. 

There is one movie, not even a very popular one I don't think.  Most of my friends will say that having this as my favorite secures my spot as "least fun person ever." 

Here you go:

Love story.  Political intrigue.  Some fantastic dialogue.  Awesome! 

Don't knock it until you try it!

~Becky